7.3.08

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26.2.08

27 DRESSES


Jane (Katherine Heigl) is the living embodiment of the old saying "always a bridesmaid, never a bride." Just when she thinks her life can't get any lonlier, her sister Tess (Malin Akerman) announces her engagement to the man of Jane's dreams. But which sibling will eventually end up standing at the altar first?


Cast Katherine Heigl, James Marsden, Malin Akerman, Edward Burns, Melora Hardin, Judy Greer
Director(s) Anne Fletcher
Writer(s) Aline Brosh McKenna
Status In theaters (wide)
Genre(s) Comedy
Release Date Jan. 18, 2008
Running Time 107 minutes
Web Site 27dressesthemovie.com

Who's in It: Katherine Heigl, Malin Akerman, Edward Burns, James Marsden, Judy Greer

The Basics: Heigl hoards bridesmaid dresses and secretly loves her boss (Burns) who, in turn, is about to marry Heigl's sister. Meanwhile, Marsden worms his way into Heigl's life just so he can write a mean-spirited newspaper article about her. Who do you think winds up falling in love? Guess! Go on, guess!

What's the Deal? Welcome to 2008, an enlightened time when women aren't obsessed with weddings and willing to waste years of their lives secretly pining for male-genitalia-having blocks of wood; a time of assertive, interesting, vibrant women who've absorbed the lessons of their hippie feminist mothers and realized that no man who uses them and lies to them and publicly humiliates them is worth one more second of however much time he's been given. Except in this movie, which takes place in Crazy Backwards Shallow Values Land and where everyone's a moron.

What You Finally Learn About Heigl's Character From Watching the Part Where They Show You All the Dresses and a Montage of the Weddings Where She Wore Them: That she has a lot of wacky, interesting friends, none of whom seem to share anything in common with Heigl's blank-slate personality, made up of 50 percent pretty and 50 percent nice.

Who Makes You Wish It Was About Her Instead: Greer. She's the smarter, funnier, loves-to-drink-and-have-sex friend of Heigl's that they bring in to liven things up from time to time. Her fate is to be single. But when the alternative is to be married to bores like Marsden's or Burns' characters, you wind up envying her.

Advice for the Star That She'll Never Read:
Dear Katherine,
In your recent Vanity Fair interview you say that Knocked Up "paints women as shrews" and as "humorless." But you know what? At least the female characters in that movie had personalities. This one paints its heroine as a simpering fool who's easily manipulated and then throws away her own dignity for the sake of getting a man. Gross. Find a better script next time. Even if it's written by Judd Apatow.

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DEFINITELY, MAYBE

As a father (Ryan Reynolds) goes through a difficult divorce, his young daughter (Abigail Breslin) starts questioning him on his entire romantic history. So, he tells her the tale of the three great loves of his life and she must guess which woman eventually became her mother. Is it the sweet-as-pie girl-next-door Emily (Elizabeth Banks)? His best friend (Isla Fisher)? Or the flaky journalist (Rachel Weisz)?

Cast Ryan Reynolds, Isla Fisher, Derek Luke, Abigail Breslin, Rachel Weisz, Elizabeth Banks
Director(s) Adam Brooks
Writer(s) Adam Brooks
Status In theaters (wide)
Genre(s) Comedy
Release Date Feb. 14, 2008
Running Time 105 minutes
Web Site definitelymaybemovie.com

Who's in It: Ryan Reynolds, Abigail Breslin, Derek Luke, Kevin Kline, Rachel Weisz, Isla Fisher, Elizabeth Banks

The Basics: If Reynolds ever happens to wind up as your dad in some sort of Freaky Friday-esque body-switching accident, it's imperative that you never ask him to tell you a bedtime story. Because he will. And it'll be all about how he met your mommy. And it'll take two hours. And that story will include a lot of sex details — actual line uttered by Breslin: "Daddy, what's a threesome?" — and will also somehow be the most sleep-inducing tale ever told. You'll get more somnolent satisfaction out of a cup of warm milk and a chocolate chip cookie.

What's the Deal? What if there were no bland white people in the world? Would romantic comedies suddenly star Mr. T and Shilpa Shetty? Or would America Ferrera just step in and pick up the slack? Anyway, I guess it's not the whiteness I'm having a problem with here, it's the empty-box zero amounts of interesting being piled invisibly high onscreen. Should the handsome guy pick this hot lady? Or this one? Or maybe this one? Is there a good reason for any of them to actually like each other for more than purely physical reasons? Even their environment has been stripped of anything that would make you know it as New York City. It's like they just shot this on the Friends set.

Lies Lies Lies, Yeah: Let's say you're a fan of those Richard Curtis-style movies from England like Four Weddings and a Funeral, Notting Hill and Love, Actually. And let's say you've seen the ads for this one where they practically rub your whole face in the fact that it's "From the makers of … (!!!)" those films. Well, that's false. It's from the same production company. And the only British people here are doing American accents.

Politics? What Politics? A good chunk of the plot is devoted to the recent past of the 1992 Clinton campaign for president. And the characters are, for the most part, politically aware, socially concerned people. But zero mention is made of the fact that something else happened after Clinton. And none of the people onscreen can be seen or heard caring about any of it. It's all about their dull little romantic travails. I didn't think I could dislike these nincompoops any more than I did in the first 60 minutes, but it actually creates an environment where that is possible.

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JUMPER

One day, Davey (Hayden Christensen) discovers he has an amazing ability. He can teleport himself to any location at will. Using his newfound power to find the man who killed his mother, Davey unwittingly becomes a target of National Security Agency officers and another person with the same exact power. Based on the popular young adult novel by Steven Gould.
Cast Hayden Christensen, Jamie Bell, Rachel Bilson, Samuel L. Jackson, Diane Lane, Michael Rooker
Director(s) Doug Liman
Writer(s) David S. Goyer, Jim Uhls, Simon Kinberg
Status In theaters (wide)
Genre(s) Sci-Fi/Fantasy
Release Date Feb. 14, 2008
Running Time 88 minutes
Web Site jumperthemovie.com

Who's in It: Hayden Christensen, Rachel Bilson, Jamie Bell, Samuel L. Jackson, Diane Lane

The Basics: The most boring man alive discovers he has the ability to teleport through space to wherever he wants to go — "Did I just teleport?" he asks himself the first time it happens. When he robs some banks for funding along the way? No big deal. But then Samuel L. with a white afro shows up as a "paladin," whose job is to stalk and kill jumpers. He keeps yelling, "ONLY GOD SHOULD HAVE THIS POWER!" while trying to eliminate the most boring man alive. And you're sort of rooting for Sam …

What's the Deal? This would have been a perfect piece of junk entertainment if they had only managed to steer clear of the acting pothole that is Christensen. Seriously, is it possible for an actor to have a negative amount of charisma? He makes you wish Stanley Kubrick were alive still and had cast him in the Keir Dullea blank-faced astronaut role in 2001: A Space Odyssey. As it is, you only wake up when now grown-up Billy Elliot star Bell comes along to be all swaggery and interesting.

What Would Have Happened If This Had Been a Smarter Movie:
1. Lane would have had more than five minutes of stunt-casting screen time. For as much as she had to do here, they could have let Heidi Klum play the part for a lot less money.
2. Lane's character's meaty moral conflict — she's a paladin, too, just like Jackson — could have become a metaphor for a whole lot of other stuff and not sacrificed the action. It could have been a potentially heartbreaking storyline. And it just lies there like a wad of barely chewed gum on the sidewalk.

How Late You Can Be: You can spend the first 30 minutes of this film eating one of everything at the concession and then checking your e-mail in the lobby. All he does is jump around from place to place. After that, the chasing and the fighting starts, and the movie starts to be fun. Then you'll almost forget you've just paid money to see more of young Anakin.

Still Better Than: Awake, Factory Girl, Life as a House, the picnic scene in Episode II.

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THE COUNTERFEITERS

A master counterfeiter is thrown into a concentration camp by the Nazis and forced to make fake foreign currency, but will he help his evil captors or sabotage them? In Nazi-era Germany, Salomon "Sally" Sorowitsch (Karl Markovics) is a master counterfeiter who is arrested and thrown into a concentration camp. Once his captors notice his unique skills, he's soon transported to better living conditions and asked to become a part of Operation Berhard, an extensive scheme by the Nazis to produce fake foreign currency. At first taking on the job with zeal, Sally has a crisis of conscience when his friend Adolf Burger (August Diehl) suggests that they try to undermine the German war effort rather than support it.
Chaplin, August Zirner, Marie Bäumer
Director(s) Stefan Ruzowitzky
Writer(s) Stefan Ruzowitzky
Status In theaters (limited)
Genre(s) Drama
Release Date Feb. 22, 2008
Running Time 98 minutes
Web Site sonyclassics.com/thecounterfeiters

Who's in It: Karl Markovics, August Diehl, David Striesow

The Basics: A group of criminals, artists and financiers arrested and placed in a Nazi concentration camp are forced to forge British pounds and American dollars for the Third Reich in an effort to destabilize the economies of the allied forces. In return for good work, they're allowed to live and are kept in relatively luxurious accommodations (i.e., they have food and clothes and beds with sheets).

What's the Deal? One of the more interesting developments in Holocaust-themed movies in the past couple of years has been the emergence of stories where the prisoners themselves are no saints (like the documentary Steal a Pencil for Me, about the somewhat adulterous lovers who kept in touch via clandestine letter-writing) and/or are willing to do whatever it takes to survive (like in Paul Verhoeven's Black Book, in which a woman who wouldn't have been out of place in the cast of Showgirls used what she had to get out alive, not really caring who died along the way as long as it wasn't her). No more noble Life Is Beautiful suffering, everything's darker, bleaker and probably more close to tense, complicated real life than we've been led to believe.

Based Upon: The memoir of Adolf Burger, one of the men who helped forge the money but who also presumably spent a lot of his time trying to sabotage the operation.

Weird Pedigree: From director Stefan Ruzowitzky, the man behind the not-scary-at-all German horror franchise Anatomy, as well as the loony All the Queen's Men, the one starring Matt LeBlanc, about drag-queen secret agents infiltrating the Nazis (yes, this is a real movie). It's good to see him direct something not terrible this time out.

By the Time Most of You Read This Review and Have a Chance to See It … it will already have won or lost the Oscar for Best Foreign Film. And it's got a good shot, being about WWII and all. The Academy loves that sort of thing.

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